Ok now I know your wondering what the hell is Elfie posting today....I came across this article last night surfing the internet while hubby was watching some lets kill everybody movie...and it cracked me up....
Vacuum screamer
A US mother-of-three has invented a sex toy that connects to a vacuum cleaner to give an orgasm in just ten seconds.
The gadget, called Vortex Vibrations, works by concentrating the air flow to create a rapid and gentle vibration, reports the Sun.
Inventor Joanne Drysdale claims it can give multiple, back-to-back orgasms lasting up to a minute a time - and it does not even touch the skin.
The 49-year-old former toolmaker was cleaning her carpets when she came up with the idea for Vortex, which sells for £35 through lovehoney.co.uk.
She saw how a piece of rubber that had got caught in the nozzle was gently resonating in the air flow. She also felt a soft stimulation to her fingertips as she tried to remove the rubber.
At the time Joanne, from Utah, had not had sex for 15 years following her divorce.
She said: "In my attempts to alleviate frustration, I began to think what I could do. I noticed how the rubber moved in the top of the vacuum.
"After several hours, I came up with the prototype. The first time I tried it I reached an orgasm within 10 seconds.
"That was when I knew I was on to something that could potentially bring pleasure to all women."
Ok now does anybody out there but me think that after 15 yrs, anything would get you off in 10 seconds? 
54 comments on Vacuum Sex ?
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Well,think that she has been getting her kicks else where.
No one cannot have sex over 15 years.Who she kidding.
Maybe she has more toys hidden somewhere.
Without sex in 15 years,you will be dead.LOL.
Unless,you are really old.
Don't try this Elfie,looks dangerous.LOL
It does look dangerous doesn't it...I can just see someone trying to explain to an ER doc what they were doing..*ROFL*
lol that's funny elfie (I think I'd be too embarassed to take credit for inventing it) :0)
LOL I just can't imagine lugging around a vacuum..LOL
Bet it wouldn't work too well for a man. LOL
I don't know..there might be attachments..
Lol.
What is "sex?"
LOL
*ROFL*
I sense an entire industry appearing next:
For instance, how about cans of that stuff you sprinkle on carpets before you vacuumj them that makes the rug smell better?
Washable vacuum bags that come in an assortment of colors, such as "Orgasmic Pink" and "Climactic Cerise.?
Vacuum cleaners with iPods attached that are loaded with theme music.
Quiet vacuums that don't interrupt the event with loud sucking sounds.
You are so funny!
Yeah they would have to stop that loud sucking noise for sure..LOL
Oh, the secret joys of a vacuum cleaner! (And I thought it was my own little secret! lol) I love jondude's comments above! (Way funny, but all very possible?)
Yes, my dear friend, I was a bit startled by your title. I did wonder what the hell you were posting!
Yeah I love jondude comments...and they could be a reality...I love those ideas...LOL
LOL! You are so right!
AJ
Can't you just see somebody going to the hospital and trying to explain...Well you see Doc the vacuum went a little crazy......*ROFL*
I can't made a long comment. I must go web surfing; for some reason I feel that need!
LOL Need a new vacuum maybe?
Reminds me when my boss came back from a residential course to find that her husband had needed to see the doctor quite urgently due to a 'broken' penis! He had been 'missing' her and because of this used the vacuum cleaner to assist his sexual relief and suffered some sort of fracture (if that's possible) to his male member!
Ouch!! OMG...now I wonder how he explained that to his boss...or his wife...Well honey I got horny, and I saw the vacuum...and one thing led to another...*ROFL*
Made my day, I'll tell you. I just got done power mopping the kitchen, and sex did not enter my mind.
You were mopping hun, gotta use the vacuum on this one..*ROFL*
Somehow, when I am cleaning house, sex is the LAST thing on my mind!! I would say this woman may not have had sex in the traditional sense of the word; but she has kept the juices flowing some way!!
I would say so...if a vacuum gave her ideas...LOL
I was in a garden club once in a small village. At the first meeting I was the only man present. Before she introduced me the President said to the group, "Will the male member please stand up."
I could have peed syself but I managed not to laugh outloud.
LMAO!!
Oh lord...I know I would have lost it....How did you keep a straight face??? LOL LOL
I am sure it has an attachment for the guys that won't break the penis.
It will come in John Deere green I'm sure...
Just think your boyfriend would be good at cleaning too...*ROFL*
Dyson's new model smokes a cigarette after it is turned off.
LOL
And cleans up after itself...
I loved the comment about the ER cuz it reminded me of the article in cosmo a couple of months ago "Sex sessions that ended in the ER" LMAO you'd be surprised what these ppl had to explain!!
I'll be the guinea pig and try this thing out...NOT! I can't believe the things they come up with and make money on! I wonder if she's made enough money to buy her a real man! lol
If she hasn't she could always buy a blow up one and let her new invention blow it up...
Okay-after one of the most pitiful feel - sorry- for- myself weekends in awhile (at least since last Saturday) this post and comments made me laugh...a much needed relief. Kind of makes me hope I come across a balloon next time I vacuum!
Can you hear her kids explaining where the family $ came from?!?!?
Well hun glad I could help give you a laugh..
Guess she could tell them she invented a new kinda "cleaning" devise?
Ya'll I have a Dyson but it does not have an attachment like that. Maybe I should take it back for a newer model. Of course, mine is the Animal which is deep metallic purple so my attachment would have to be color coded to match. Now I have seen everything! LMAO
The animal
sounds like it could already be dangerous...*ROFL* Oh yes now color coded would have to be essecential... 
Too funny...
Elfie, you're making me pee my pants laughing! Now I have to get off of Blogster so that I can order one....LMAO
Well now just remember you might have to order and extra "long" extention cord to go with it...ever time I vacuum the damn cord never reaches where I want it too...
Is there a battery model for the outdoorsy-type woman?
From what I read it connect to a vacuum...that's gonna have to be one heck of an extention cord...*ROFL*
*ROFL*
LOL that was great...love your comment at the bottom LOL
Thanks hun...it just cracks me up every time I think of someone lugging a vacuum around with it's little "attachments"....
Hmmmm,is this kinda like the women sitting on top of the washing machine during the spin cycle for a quicky??
Yep and both help you clean your house..LOL
LOL